Surviving Toddler-hood

Do you ever feel like if you have just one more day with a smart-mouth toddler, you're going to go insane? If you could see me right now, you'd see me waving my hand vigorously. That is so ME right now. The Stress Away Essential Oil is flowing like crazy over here. My daughter is a threenager (that's the fun word for a toddler who's three going on thirteen). The hands on the hips, the stomping of the feet, the back talking, smart mouthing, if you say one more thing I'm going to lose my mind, kind of attitude...this is a threenager. They are loud. They are opinionated. And they DO NOT listen. So, how do we survive the threenage years? I've learned a few things in the months of dealing with toddler life and the giant attitude that comes with it. Here are our 5 ways to tame the threenager within.

1) Quality Time - I learned this from Stella. She would come up to me and say things like "Can I just have you?" or "I just want you." These are signs that you're wanted and more importantly, needed by your toddler. I have found that Stella's attitude is MUCH better when I truly engage with her and focus completely on her. The threenager attitude is often times their loud way of saying "Pay attention to me!!" When you take the time to lay aside all other distractions, and truly focus on the interests of your toddler, you will see great results! (speaking from experience!)

2) Communication - I KNOW it can be frustrating dealing with a kid who doesn't want to listen...but taking the time, even after the punishment has been given, to communicate with them is extremely important. My husband and I literally have daily 'Come to Jesus' talks with Stella. (That's our nick name for an intervention) We sit her down and talk to her about what she did wrong, how she can improve on that behavior and why we had to punish her. Then without question, we tell her we love her and we try to move on from there.

3) Prayer - Oils help a lot, but they are no match for Jesus. When the kids aren't listening, pray. When you feel like you're going to die from the stress, pray. Pray until you just can't pray anymore. Trust me, it will keep you from hitting the wall. This is a crucial time in the lives of our kids, and prayer is an essential tool.

4) Affirmation - Positive words go a LONG way. I've made a point to look for ways that I can compliment and affirm Stella and Ronny. I want them to not only know that they are loved, but to have a sense of self worth and to know who they are in Christ. If they know who they are in Christ, they're more likely to strive to please Him. (I know that's a big concept for a toddler, but trust me, even at a young age, they are capable of wanting to please the Lord) We say positive and uplifting things like "You are so smart!" (and then explaining why they are) and complimenting their good choices. My kids love to be affirmed. They glow when they know we are proud of them. Pointing out the positive things they do to make us proud, takes the focus off of the negative things they do to make us frustrated. 

5) Gratitude - This one can be a tough one. Even when they're being defiant. Even when they do everything you have told them not to do. Even when they say hurtful and horrible things. Be grateful. I know firsthand that there are moments when we as parents just want to throw our hands up in the air and give up. Parenting is extremely hard. But even in your most frustrated moment, just remember...there are a million people out there wishing they could have children, and they can't for various reasons. You are blessed. They are a blessing. Don't let yourself lose sight of that. ;)

Got an incredible parenting secret for surviving the threenage years? I'd love to hear it! ;)